31 March, 2011

From light, darkness.

You used to be the reason I'd smile,
How easily it all turned sour,
You'd be the one to make my day,
I feel I've crashed so far down,
I thought your hand would be there,
Always,
To pull me to my feet,
And up to where you shone the way,
You've faded now, a fallen star,
A smile faked and gaze so lost,
I wondered how it would feel,
Sometimes,
To be the one that you leant on,
The light in your darkness,
You were the glow, and now the shadow,
Casting a pall on the light you created,
To think this would happen,
Never.

23 March, 2011

How many hearts can one break.

When you shatter a heart,
There's more than just one,
To tear asunder,

It's more than one face, drenched in tears,
More than one mind, facing its fears,

Life in slow motion, rewind,
Two parts broken heart
To one part mind,

It's more than one stomach, nauseous and vacant,
More than one faith, to be shaken,

It's uncertain what's stronger, the hurt or the hate,
Or the unwanted love that lingers long after.

20 March, 2011

How to say goodbye?

"Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend. Somewhere along in the bitterness." - The Fray

Not much else can so accurately describe how I feel right now. I love The Fray for their way of putting things so eloquently. But in my own, much more brutal way...

What's happening to us?
Fuck, we're spinning apart
Tearing away, out of control
Like we never had anything in common.

Clashing like cymbals
A din like thunder
Shouting, shrieking, screaming
And it's gonna end with us split in two.

I'm saying no I swear
In my head I don't want this
I can't tell you out loud
For fear I'll whisper goodbye.

17 March, 2011

Fused.

We're fused, in that state where you can't split one into two,
Melded together, twisted and strange,
I can't get unstuck, you're me and I'm you.

You're in my smile and in my head,
We made memories,
That I'm afraid to touch, they're sticky as glue,
One touch and I'm right back there,
Fused.

Can't get away,
You're yes and I'm no,
Can't get away,
Don't tell me what I already know.

We're fused.

13 March, 2011

On monotony.

Thoughts during a lecture...
I close my eyes and dream,
Of sleeping and losing my mind,
How I, how I wish I could drift,
And lose track of the time.

12 March, 2011

The depths of a dream.

I'm trying to remember that darkness, but truthfully that's all it is, is darkness. How could it be so compelling - something to rightfully be afraid of? And yet I dream of it, hold the fragile hope in my heart that one day I will find it, or at least be able to remember it accurately. Because the only place it comes to me is in my dreams. It's all fresh, right there on the surface of my mind when I open my eyes, ready to be skimmed off and recalled. But as soon as I try to imagine it, it's gone once again.

11 March, 2011

Orphaned Ink.

It doesn't matter how often I write words down,
Because they can mean and dream all they like,
But the truth is, they're lonely and alone,
They can long and lust and lie all they like,
Without a purpose, they drift meaningless,
Just waiting and hoping for someone to call on,
The words scream frustration from the page,
Aching for the moment when eyes bring them to life,
So then I can say that I wrote them for you,
And the words have someone to call their own.

To begin.

With which I write...
To start my blog, I had best describe it. It will be a collection of thoughts written in a way that makes sense to me. And maybe some thoughts from others added in, which may make more sense than mine... But here is why I am starting the blog:

My words are searching for someone to call their own. So here they are, released from the pages I wrote them on, and maybe you'll discover the words I wrote for you.
 
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